Hello Everyone, In this post I would like to address the raising popularity of Causal Sex and how it effects friendships. Friends with Benefits is a term that I hear more and more frequently and it makes me wonder, what do you do with that friend once the benefits are gone (meaning once you are bored, or someone ends the agreement)?
I happen to believe in any sexual relationship, one of two things end up happening...
- Someone develops feelings
- Someone gets bored
So in the instance of "friends" with benefits, when one of those things happens, the situation changes entirely. I have witnessed people in this sort of agreement fall in love with each other and have it turn into a great stable relationship, and that's a beautiful thing, being friends and then lovers is how some of the best love stories begin, but in the latter scenario where someone loses interest in the other person, does that mean that friendship is forever lost?
I don't think its possible to ever be "just friends" with someone that you were sexually involved with. I think that once that line has been crossed the friendship has been tainted and every visit, conversation, or experience after that moment will always be biased and different than any other innocent friendship. Even if both parties agree to end the sexual relationship, they will always find themselves thinking about that experience, sizing up the other persons future romantic prospects etc...
What are your thoughts?
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9 Response to Friendship after Sex... is it possible?
FRIENDS WITH BENEFIT IM ALL FOR IT BUT THERE ARE PROS AND CONS TO HAVING FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, WE ALL KNOW THE PRO IS SEX BUT THE CON OF THE WHOLE "FWB" IS THAT HE OR SHE WULD CATCH FEELINGS CUZ THEY ARE SINGLE, AND ARE MISSING THAT SOMEONE SPECIAL IN THEIR LIFE. AFTER THE SEX THE FWB CAN LEAD IN MANY DIFFERENT DIRECTION AFTER AND IT TO BE DETERMINE BY EITHER PERSON.
I kinda have mixed feelings on this whole topic. Some ppl use the term 'fwb' too loosely. In some cases, these ppl aren't actual friends at all, but just fuck buddies lol. But with ACTUAL friends, I believe it can go either way...it can turn into something really good, or it can be a disaster. I think it all depends on a few factors: how long the 2 were friends, what their feeling were like before the sex, how the close the pair are.
I agree!
@Quay - Thats true, there is a difference between FWB and fuck buddies but what exactly is that difference?
@Alex- its true, everyone wants that special someone in their lives, but we all need sex too so its so easy to confuse the two.
Fuck buddies are just that...fuck buddies! lol! FWB are people who had an actual friendship beforehand, and decided to take it to the next level.
You are totally right... and often Fuck buddies are probably better than FWB because when it ends badly its awful :-(
Yes I personally feel it’s possible to be “just friends” that you’ve been sexually involved with. I’ve had many cases were the friends with benefits thing was just a fling that we needed to get out of our system, and after it was over we were closer than ever. I think you’ll have a better friendship.
I can uderstand that D... It would be great to be mature and evolved enough to do that, but sadly i think the ability to pull that kind of relationship off is very uncommon...
No. I don't feel friendship is possible judging on my own personal experience. Someone always catches feelings or ends up broken hearted in some way. And it may cause some resentment. It totally ruins the friendship :-/
I totally agree Natasha, its a one way ticket to ruining that friendship...
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